Grief and loss summary
As a condition of life, we all must experience loss, death and grief. For students, these experiences are potentially very impactful and will likely effect their emotions, behaviors, relationships, thoughts and academics. It is crucial to remember that there is no right or wrong way to grieve after experiencing a loss, so being sensitive to a student’s individual and cultural needs is very important.
Causes
Students may experience pain and grief following the death of a parent, grandparent, sibling, other family member, friend or pet. Other common causes of childhood grief include parental divorce or moving to a new school. This list is not exhaustive, so it is important to consider other reasons that a student may be experiencing grief , as well.
Factors/Influences
The impact of a loss and the student’s grief response may be influenced by several factors, with the most salient typically being the student’s emotional and developmental maturity. Other factors include:
· Social supports that are available
· Circumstances of the loss- traumatic, expected, etc.
· Relationship with the person or object that was lost
· The student’s previous experiences with loss and grief
· Cultural and familial expectations and traditions
How to support a grieving student
· Talk with the student, and the family if possible
· Talk with the teachers in the school about what they can expect and how to support the student in class
· Talk with students in the grieving child’s classroom, if appropriate. Ask them how they would want to be treated, emphasizing the differences in their preferences.
· Provide a way for students in the school to reach out to the grieving student. For example, making cards or drawings.
· Encourage that the student returns to his/her normal school routine, but be prepared to provide flexibility, as well. Continue to enforce school rules and expectations.
· Emphasize that there is no correct way to grieve and support and respect the student in their own way. Be careful to not imply that there is an appropriate timeline for “getting over it.”
· Be available to just listen!
Causes
Students may experience pain and grief following the death of a parent, grandparent, sibling, other family member, friend or pet. Other common causes of childhood grief include parental divorce or moving to a new school. This list is not exhaustive, so it is important to consider other reasons that a student may be experiencing grief , as well.
Factors/Influences
The impact of a loss and the student’s grief response may be influenced by several factors, with the most salient typically being the student’s emotional and developmental maturity. Other factors include:
· Social supports that are available
· Circumstances of the loss- traumatic, expected, etc.
· Relationship with the person or object that was lost
· The student’s previous experiences with loss and grief
· Cultural and familial expectations and traditions
How to support a grieving student
· Talk with the student, and the family if possible
· Talk with the teachers in the school about what they can expect and how to support the student in class
· Talk with students in the grieving child’s classroom, if appropriate. Ask them how they would want to be treated, emphasizing the differences in their preferences.
· Provide a way for students in the school to reach out to the grieving student. For example, making cards or drawings.
· Encourage that the student returns to his/her normal school routine, but be prepared to provide flexibility, as well. Continue to enforce school rules and expectations.
· Emphasize that there is no correct way to grieve and support and respect the student in their own way. Be careful to not imply that there is an appropriate timeline for “getting over it.”
· Be available to just listen!